"That's Okay"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?list=PLsEvtZl1d5vDuCudMXfhEjbo8IRofyxyU&v=ICQxZ4tNFbo

Intro

Hi, I am EmKay Archlink. I am the author of the book Unseen Powers and the NinjaGalEmKay

on most social media platforms. Welcome to RAW-tism, a podcast about my autistic experience

and my opinions on the world. On this podcast, I will be raw and unfiltered. You are always

welcome to disagree with me as long as you do so respectfully and with no name-calling. Any

usage of the r-slur will get you immediately blocked.

Topic 1

One of the most common responses I hear when disclosing my autism diagnosis is, “That’s

okay.” I stop myself each time from going on a tirade to explain how my acknowledgment is not

an apology. Late-diagnosed autistics, like myself, tend to feel like there’s something wrong. I am

not saying that is true. It is very false. What I am saying is that those who grow up not knowing

why society doesn’t suit them, as well as some of their peers may feel like an alien on their own

planet. This comes with false personalities we create to hide our “wrongness,” desperation to

memorize society’s rules, and a well of self-loathing consuming our souls.

This is why our diagnoses are assumed to contain an apology. People are so used to the

idea that we feel responsible for our “wrongness” and think that in order to properly include us,

they must accept our apology. I understand why this thought process exists, just as I understand

how, at one point, it was legal to have slaves or illegal for women to vote, but like we did then,

our society needs to adapt and evolve.

“I have autism, so I can be blunt without meaning to be.” That sentence holds the same

weight as the phrase “I have severely dry skin, so I put lotion on every hour”. It’s not an apology

but just advanced knowledge of a situation. An appropriate response could be a simple nod or

other affirmation of understanding. Using the phrase “That’s okay” is patronizing, belittling

autistics for a condition that we have no control over. Though this is most commonly used

well-intentionally and meant as a kind response, it is, at its core, ableism.

Ad Break

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Topic 2

I will never shame others for growing up in a society that taught them to be ableist thinkers.

What I will condemn, however, is the lack of effort to overcome this way of thinking. Never be

of the opinion that “-isms” don’t matter just because they don’t affect you. Anything can happen

to anyone at any time. How you act toward marginalized groups today can be how others treat

you tomorrow.

This podcast is my way of standing up for what I believe is right. I am advocating for

autistics, educating about autistics, and doing my part in making the world a better place.

Changing your thought process can be scary and challenging, but it is possible. Only you can

make up your own mind. As my mom always says, “A mind changed against its will is of the

same opinion still.” I refuse to tell anyone what they should think. I can only provide the

authenticity to help you form your own thoughts and opinions.

Outro

Regardless of your thoughts and feelings toward me, I have a love for every one of you. You are

wanted by many, loved by many, and so many want you to stay in this world. I am one of these

“many”s and will always be. I hope you enjoyed this episode, and thank you for listening to

RAW-tism.

Self-Promotion

If you’d like to support this podcast, the description includes links with referral codes to Cirkul’s water bottles, Pair Eyewear’s customizable glasses, and my favorite Amazon products. The transcript for this episode can be found for free on my Patreon, which is also linked below. 

Would you like to see more of me? In that case, visit emkayarchlink.com for links to my TikTok,

Instagram, and YouTube. My book Unseen Powers is available in hardback, paperback, or

digitally through Amazon. Remember to drink water, eat some nummies, and have your best life.

Bye!!